I just feel like.. Giving up
Death seems taste sweet
I undergo so much emotion today, maybe because of PMS too
At some point i feel so happy after reading good story but when i reflected it to myself, i feel like those kind of happiness are unreachable for me thus i feel sad and suicidal thought are climbing up again
Am i bipolar or something? I dont think so
But this kind of extreme moodswing really hurts me
Btw i got depressed again because i realize that myself is not suit to stay alive. Like natural selection, i believe that i will disappear soon cause i dont suit to stay alive.
I got to know a lot of strong people. They are normal human, they feel a lot of emotion, sad and frustate, yet they still do their best to pass their challenge
They sad, they cry, they fall and crush but they still try to stand.
To pass what test that keep crushing them.
It amazing. I amazed by their tenacity
Something that i don't have.
Okay, i use to have it. But i lost it.
I sad, i cry, i was crushed, but i can't stand. Why am I so weak and useless?
I just cant do it. I don't know. I can't.
It hurts. They hurting too, but they can stand.
And I ? Just crying and crying and doing nothing and pitying myself and becoming so useless.
I just can defined me as useless.
I undergo so much emotions today
Dopamine are not permanent.
Cortisol is
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